My Warranty's Expired!
By David Botterill on Apr 27, 2005
My warranty has expired! Last August I had an umbilical hernia. That's the kind that is a balloon coming out of your belly button. Last week I had a gallbladder attack while on a business trip to Menlo Park, CA. I was hospitalized and they wanted to remove my gallbladder before I left the hospital. The pain subsided and they let me return to Colorado. I have surgery scheduled for 5/5/2005 to have my gallbladder removed. I'm only 42. I thought my warranty was good until at least 70!
I had a brilliant idea. I planned to ask for my gallbladder and sell it on eBay. I just knew someone would buy it. Then I checked eBay's policies and they won't allow the sale of human organs. Bummer! That would have really been cool to ship my gallbladder across the U.S. I still plan on asking for it. I plan on dissecting it with my family to see just how many stones are in that confounded thing.
My father told me he had an attack and went 17 years after the attack before having it removed. The doctor that removed it said it was the worst one he had ever seen. You have to understand that in the early 1980's when they originally wanted to take it out, they would cut you from your sternum to your crotch. Now they do most of them via "laparoscopy.":http://dictionary.reference.com/search?r=2&q=laparoscopy