Monday Dec 07, 2009

The Tick Says: Take This Survey

This blog has three parts, each written for a different type of sysadmin:

For Sysadmins Who Love Justice

If you love justice, you need to take this survey. Yes, I'm fed up with surveys, too. But please take this survey. Why? Because The Tick wants you to. When The Tick says ..."Honk If You Love Justice"...do you honk? Of course you do. This is why you are my favorite kind of sysadmin. I usually get flipped off when I honk for Justice, but I don't mind. Because I Love Justice. So please take this survey. Because The Tick loves justice, too.

Survey About Solaris 10 Adoption


In appreciation for your cooperation,
The Tick hopes you will enjoy
this hilarious video
by Russell Peters:
Caution: ethnic humor and foul language:
White People, Please Beat Your Kids


For Cheap Bastard Sysadmins

OK, so you worship the Almighty Buck. You memorize each issue of The Economist. You steal the nickels from the "Leave a Penny" trays at convenience stores. You guard your time wisely and aren't willing to part with a single minute without getting something in return. We have an inducement for you: if you take the survey (should take about 10 minutes if you tell the truth, much less if you lie), we'll give you a 30% discount off the purchase of this book:




Last time I checked, InformIT was offering free shipping.




But remember, you can't just get the discount. You have to take the....

Survey About Solaris 10 Adoption

For Hardass Solaris Loyalists

You don't take kindly to people who let their kids scream in restaurants, who fail to help little old ladies cross the street, and who pick on weaklings. You're not going to be bought off by a book discount because you already know what's in the damn book and probably disagree with half of it.

So I'll explain why we want you to take this survey.

Sun wants more Solaris 8 and Solaris 9 customers to upgrade to Solaris 10. Why? Because we will make more money if you upgrade to Solaris 10. To begin with, there's less of a chance that one of our (pesky) competitors will convince you to upgrade to their (inferior) OS. But also because once you are using (the most awesome) Solaris 10 you will be tempted to buy some of our (great) new hardware. Which will let you do more for less and spend the remainder on more Sun goodies. Or exotic cars.

But there is still enough idealism left in us that we only want you to upgrade if it makes sense for you. (I may have a late model Harley, but I also really, really love my 2001 Ducati.)

So, rather than hit you over the head with a blunt marketing instrument, Sun would like to understand why some of you would rather remain with Solaris 8 or Solaris 9. That knowledge would help us design products and services to support you, such as Solaris 8 Vintage Support. It would also help us aim our Solaris 10 marketing in the right direction. For example, if you don't upgrade because you think it'll be more expensive, we can focus our time on proving why it won't. Instead of hollering about the cool new features that you already know about. But aren't interested in because you think they're too expensive.

In other words, we want you to take the survey so we can work with you better. And avoid looking stupid. Or losing you to our (lame) competitors who will sell you their (inferior) products.

Solaris 10 Adoption Survey

- Rick



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