Friday Sep 01, 2006

Chuck Norris' fists are the ultimate unbreakable two-factor authentication.

I was wondering earlier this week what would happen if computer geeks had their own version of “Chuck Norris Facts”, and if so, who would they be about: Richard Stallman, Linus Torvalds, Steve Jobs? Now I know - Bruce Schneier Facts. I have to admit I don't get a lot of them - not sure if they're just not funny or if I'm not enough of a crypto geek to get them. I do think that the top ten are some of the best. I especially liked “Most people use passwords. Some people use passphrases. Bruce Schneier uses an epic passpoem, detailing the life and works of seven mythical Norse heroes.”, “Though a superhero, Bruce Schneier disdains the use of a mask or secret identity as 'security through obscurity'.” and “Bruce Schneier once decrypted a box of AlphaBits.”

So that got me wondering who else could be immortalized this way. The Sun security commmunity could start our own Alec Muffet Facts for instance (“Alec Muffet can crack LiveJournal user passwords just by knowing whose ex-boyfriend wants to stalk her blog, but if you ask him to, he'll change yours instead.”), though we'd probably have to have a long discussion on the internal security mailing list about whether it is too soon to make jokes about what happens when you run Crack on your own ribcage.

A wider swath of the Sun community might have fun with Jonathan Schwartz Facts (“Cutting Jonathan's ponytail doesn't make him weaker, but would make his blog rank drop.”). Perhaps the Solaris community would be able to create a good list of facts about the DTrace team. (“Brian's DTrace probes can observe the state of Schroedinger's cat, but he won't tell because he prefers leaving it as a teaching example.”)

On second thought, maybe this was a question best left unanswered...

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Engineer working on Oracle Solaris and with the X.Org open source community.

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